OK so we are pretty much at the in-between point of The Realm saga. By that I mean filming and producing the story. It is here that I find self-doubt and negative thoughts permeating my skull. Suddenly nothing is good enough and everything I have done to this point is garbage!!!
It is a weird sensation considering the showing so far has done better than I expected. It’s not like people aren’t jazzed about the idea or the show…they are and it’s wonderful! I think all the negative feelings and such are coming from me.
I am sure there are many creatives (Writers, actors, musicians, etc.) who go through this experience. You get to a point where you realize that your soul is exposed in the story you are telling and you feel like no one is getting what you are trying to do and you have to fight to get the message across. It hurts and you want to yell and scream sometimes and just say “FORGET IT! I AM DONE!” Then you have a drink and you calm down.
At the end of this funk you start to remember why you did it in the first place. You look at your old notes when you conceived the idea and go “That’s right. That’s what I wanted to say and accomplish.” Suddenly you fell a little better and strengthened again.
That’s the key…at least for me. Remember why you started what you did and never let that go. It’s like a trip into the woods, you feel determined to walk the path, but somewhere the path leaves you and you get lost and scared. Then, you remember the path and find your way again and the journey becomes fresh and you can travel until the light at the close of the path leads you to the end.